"Chocolate Covered Autumns" - Holy Cow 2002 (Gundam Wing/AC) (fanfiction.net)



Hello everyone! I'm back! *ignores the moans and groans of the little people* and I'm going to update another chapter!

Ok, but seriously, in case no one has noticed, this is going to be a pretty slow fiction... not like it just drags on and on but because..ok, so it drags, but not because there is going to be like, bad people who comes between Heero and Duo or anything like that. For those who read my other story, You Think You Know, trust me, it's nothing like what happens in there. There isn't going to be much of angst in this story because personally, my life is screwed up with that kind of stuff right now and I just want to write something light and humorous to improve my mood.

This story is going to consist of several chapters, each with their own story that doesn't necessarily revolve around Duo and Heero, making this longer than needed. I'm sure you've all noticed how I pay attention to the trivial matters but that's because I think the funniest stuff happens in those insignificant events, and I'll try to cover one each chapter. I update pretty quickly, but there are going to be those days that I have to pay attention to school and such. Hey, I'm still in High School and I'm like...failing my writing class. Yes, I'm shocked at that also. I haven't gotten a good essay grade yet. This is my longest chapter and that's why it took me so long to update... ha, which for me, is only about two days. ^__^ I should really stop writing so much and start my homework.

Warnings: Don't say I didn't warn you! There are some major popular culture bashings in this story, and not just in this chapter. Also, there are many sexual undertones and jokes. If you take offense, just don't read. It's quite simple really.



Chocolate Covered Autumn



Chapter 6 Round One



"He's coming today, he's coming today!" Blissfully ignorant of the curious, and the few frightened gazes on my back, I continued to waltz around the tables, less than gracefully with a mop in my hands as the reluctant dance partner. Step back, step forward, jump over the chair, accidentally stumbling on Quatre's foot, step back again, and bump into Hilde who hastily balances the dishes that threaten to tip over in her arms. Another twirl and I came face to face with a less than pleased Wufei.

His arms slowly came nearer my face, and by all outward appearances, he seems to want them wrapped around my neck and choke me until I arrive at the heavenly gates. Who am I to turn down his generous offer? Snatching his hands quickly and ignoring his surprised gasp, I pulled him close to me, one arm resting on his shoulders, and the other sneakily snaked around his waist, maneuvering a startled Wufei to move.

"Dance with me!" Yelling happily, I was able to manipulate Wufei in half of a tango step before the haze cleared and he realized just what exactly he was doing, and with who of all people.

"MAXWELL!! LET ME GO!!"

"Awwww... Little Wufei never went to his senior prom did he?" I rebutted with a wicked grin on my face and a blush quickly manifested on the face of my friend.

"That's none of your business!" He defended himself embarrassedly while Quatre, Hilde, and Relena smirked behind us at how badly I was torturing Wufei. Of all the people in the world, Wufei is probably the one who suffers my smartass persona the most, because we've all got to admit it, a little loosening up would do him some good. You should have seen him before I worked my magic on him. Can we all say.. nonstop PMS in a guy's body?

"Oh come on! It's nothing to be ashamed of!"

"Maxwell!"

"In fact, if I'd known you then, I'd have jumped at the chance to go with you! And after the dance, I would have jumped you period!" With that comment and an evocative leer at the tomato red boy in front of me, I released him with a final push and an half attempted rotation. Staring at me as if I've just grew another head, Wufei panted while leaning against the table to catch his breath. Meanwhile, I tried to control my laughter and bend down on one knee in front of my victim. Looking at his fearful eyes and collecting all the willpower that I possessed not to laugh hysterically, I looked at him in all artificial seriousness.

"Wufei, will you marry me?" Giving him a sultry smile, I wiggled my eyebrows suggestively. As you can see, the seriousness never lasts long. Ignoring the incredulous boy, I looked towards the rest of the group and grinned at them.

"So, you guys want to come with us to Las Vegas and sell our souls for some good sex?"

Giving Wufei a teasing gaze, Quatre shared a smile with Trowa and looked back at me, who was resisting the urge to drop to the ground and laugh my ass off.

"I'm sorry but I'm afraid that's not possible, see, we have a date, so alas, you two will have to make do with our blessings. Have fun!" Quatre declared cheerfully as one of his hands entwined with Trowa's and they both headed for the door.

"With Duo's imaginative mind, I'm sure they'll never be bored. Bondage is always fun." Trowa patted Quatre's grinning head, as if to reassure his lover that we will indeed, be productive in our marriage. With a wink goodbye at me, my favorite couple escaped before Wufei can fully comprehend the hinted implications and scream his little unwilling head off.

"Yeah, my shift is over too and though I love you two to death, there's no way I'm going to miss collapsing on my couch and watching n'sync shake those asses. They can't sing but hey, who watches for the songs anyway?" Hilde said, giggling helplessly before waving goodbye to the last three people in the almost empty shop. It was pretty late at night, but still, I have this conviction that Heero will come. The bell signaled her departure and my eyes rested on Relena.

"How about you? Care to take upon our offer?" I said, completely ignoring the part that Wufei has said nothing during this exchange, being too shocked at the sudden turn of events.

"I'll think about it..does sound fun though." Relena had an evil grin that almost matched the one that I knew I would see reflected in the mirror.

"How about a threesome then?" I asked in an entirely innocent tone, noticing in the corner of my eyes that Wufei suddenly weakened in the knees and had to grip onto the table to support his weight. Oh geez, you'd think that I'd feel guilty about teasing the poor boy so much, but it's had to resist; temptation being stronger than the will and all that junk, not to mention that I've never tried to resist.

"Maybe, but then, you two would have to prove yourself to me first. I don't share my talents with just anyone, you know." The grin on her face widened almost impossibly. Have I told you that I loved the girl yet? So evil, so wicked, so cruel, and yet, so me!

"Sure! It will definitely be my pleasure." Looking back at a beet red Wufei who looks as if he's ready to have a nosebleed very soon with both of his hands on the table, trying desperately not to collapse and show the effect that this conversation was having on him. You'd think after all these years with me, he'd learn not to be affected so much, but Wufei is a stubborn one who refuses to change. Pride is way too overrated anyway. He has abandoned all pretenses of being in control with his lips pressed into a firm line and looking as if he's ready to flee out the door at any second now.

"Honey, want to put on a show for Relena to convince her to join our little love nest? You know you'll enjoy it.." I swear, I'm so magnificently evil and wonderfully shameless!

Finally finding that he does in fact, possess a mouth like anyone else in this world, Wufei tried desperately to remember how to use it.

"NO!!" Apparently, he is very good at it too... I think my ears are going to be deaf now.

"Geez..you sure know how to hurt a guy's confidence, don't you?" Laughing softly, I rose from the ground and dusted my knees, knowing that the fun was over and that it's time to get back to work. Cooking and teasing my friends are the top two on my list, but I'm sure if Heero agrees, I can fit sex in there some where.

"Am I interrupting something here?" A quiet and yet, slightly amused voice called out behind me. Speak of the devil... but a very sexy devil.

I turned to him, prepared to greet him with a great big smile before it suddenly occurred to me that I didn't hear him come in, and by the looks on Relena and Wufei's surprised face, neither did they. He wouldn't sound so amused.. unless he heard something, oh God. It's time to find a hole and crawl in it, become a hermit, and just abandon all hopes of being regarded as mature, sophisticated and professional chef for life.

With one hand covering my blushing face, I peeked at the bemused cobalt eyes through my fingers and mentally cursed at myself for being so childish. This has got to be the greatest first impressions, first calling him a bastard in the supermarket and now, discussing the possibility of rocking Wufei's world right in front of him. Shaking my head embarrassedly, I collected myself as best as I could and looked towards him with a helpless sigh.

"So, how much of that little show did you see?" I questioned him warily with my hands on my face, still not trusting that my cheeks have returned to their normal colors. To the right of me, I distantly heard a small snicker coming from Relena, who is obviously not as humiliated as I am or as worried about the earth not opening up to shallow her. Did I say that I loved her a while ago? Well, that can be easily ignored and debated.

"Not much." He said calmly without the slightest hint that he has just seen me make a fool out of myself. I just regarded him silently.

"How much is not much? Because you know, I have to know how much I should mentally erase from my memory after tonight."

"Bondage to love nest." He answered evenly as if he had to deal with idiots like me every single day of his life and that it was nothing out of the ordinary. His definition of "not much" is apparently different from mine.

"Oh Good because if that's all you heard, then it's no big deal. Now if you'll excuse me, I think I'll go dig myself a grave and go lay in it."

"Don't worry about it, Duo's always like this." Sensing my discomfort, Relena decided to break the uncomfortable silence by defending me, though not the smartest way to do it. If she wants to help, that's really unnecessary; she can just shut up and I'll be plenty grateful. Realizing that what she said wasn't exactly the best thing to say in this situation, she chuckled uneasily at my murderous glare and looked as if she's prepared to take flight.

"Relena, I would like you to remember today, the 17th, because it is the last day you'll see daylight again." I whispered to her coolly as I approached a few steps closer to her grimacing face. At my words, she had such a look of horror and devastation that it even surprised me. I didn't know that she took my threats that seriously.

"WHAT? TODAY'S THE 17TH?" She looked at Wufei and me, both stunned by her reaction to a mere date that doesn't ring a solitary bell in my memory. After we both nodded, she looked bewildered and turned towards Heero, eyes begging for confirmation. When he nodded also, convincing her finally that today was in fact, the 17th and we did not lie to her, she looked as if she wanted to kill someone. The three of us, including Heero who acknowledged the fear in our eyes, wisely decided to take a few precautious steps back while Wufei and I involuntarily leaned towards each other for protection.

"I need to go now!" She declared quickly and without even giving us a second glance, she practically shot out the door after she snatched her coat from the coat hanger. Wufei who apparently had a death wish scampered to follow her, screaming after her departing figure.

"Where are you going?" Awwww..so he does care more than he lets on.

"I have a date!" The indistinct response that came in the distance was vaguely heard among the voices of small children playing in the streets and all the window shopping old women.

"WHAT?" That came from a very stunned Wufei.

"THE HELL?!" Now, this time, that came from a very angry Wufei. It amazes me how quickly he changes moods. Maybe I did have something in the PMS theory.

I walked up to him and patted him on the shoulders, attempting to smoother his anger. To tell the truth, I didn't expect that reply either. Though they have never publicly announced it, it was thought to be a given that Relena and Wufei were dedicated to each other thoroughly and though I've joked about the sexual tension between the two for quite a while, it was true. They have never whispered soft endearments to each other like Trowa and Quatre did, but still, I was sure that Wufei and Relena loved each other as much as the other couple, well..not as sure now. This is probably the first time that I've seen Wufei openly express his affections, or in this case, possessiveness towards Relena. And trust me, it's not pretty.

"Wufei, calm down." His harsh breathing gradually slowed down and a sparkle appeared in his eyes that I didn't like one bit.

"Duo, do you have your car?" I looked at him shocked speechless, for a while, anyway.

"Tell me that you're not thinking of following her." I prayed to God that this wasn't his plan.

"No, I'm not.. We are." Ok, plan B appeals to me even less than plan A.

"No! And besides, I don't have my car today!" He looked at my face as if searching for the truthfulness there, and after he was finally persuaded that I was telling the truth, he looked down bitterly.

"I do have my car." The voice, certain and composed suddenly piped up behind me sounded more like a statement than an offer, but the suggestion in that voice was undeniably clear.

"Heero, you have no idea what you're getting into." I warned him cautiously when I observed the sparkle in Wufei's eyes became brighter as the owner of those eyes looked to Heero in a new light that frankly, I didn't like one bit. It seems that Wufei was all for the suggestion and was moments away from jumping Heero and forcing the boy to drop the keys in a second.

"You like this girl?" He asked Wufei frankly and for once, Wufei nodded without hesitation, giving a just as frank answer as the question asked.

"She likes you?" This time, Wufei cast his downtrodden eyes towards me, wordlessly pleading for me to answer for him. Resisting the request in those eyes was impossible and I tentatively nodded my head at Heero.

"What's the problem then?" Wasting no words than necessary, Heero is blunt and to the point when he does open his mouth. Of course, when he puts it so simply like that, there really seems to be no problem with what the other two boys were willing to do. Besides, with that intense and exotic pair of cobalt eyes directed at me, I can do nothing than weakly nod my agreement, storing every particular detail to remember in my fantasies.

"Let's go then." Wufei declared determinately and rushed out the door, completely overlooking the problem that he has no idea what Heero's car looks like. I looked at Heero and asked him quietly the question that has been in my mind the moment he got involved in this mess willingly.

"Why are you doing this?" Those eyes looked deep in thought at my question and after a seemingly long pause that couldn't have lasted for more than a few seconds, he faced me and shook his head.

"Well, without her, your threesome wouldn't work, now would it?" I stared at him in silence for what seemed like eternity and just when I was drowning in his faintly amused eyes, a very unpleasant scream interrupted my daydream.

"MAXWELL! YUY!"

Threatening to kill Wufei in my mind, I walked out of the door and flipped over the sign in the door that indicated we were open, and locked the door with absolutely no clue what the hell I've gotten myself into, and by the looks of it, neither does my companions.

A black BMW was parked outside and I whistled at it appreciatively before an impatient Wufei pushed me inside brusquely. That boy has absolutely no concept of beauty when he sees it. That's probably why he doesn't appreciate me nearly enough.

"I guess that second chance would have to wait a while, doesn't it?" Once in the car, I looked towards my side where Heero was concentrated on the road. How I wish he can look at me with that absorption.. oh bad, bad mental thought..actually very good, but bad, bad in this situation.

"Do you have a guess to where she went?"

For the first time since we got into the car, Wufei looked taken aback. Taking notice at the embarrassed blush on his face from the hind mirror, I groaned out loud and twisted my neck over my shoulder to glare at him.

"You have no clue, do you?" The feared response was given as he nodded awkwardly in the back seat.

"It was a spur of the moment thingy!" He protested uneasily, shifting in his seat restlessly thinking of what HIS woman was doing with someone other than him.

"But we are NOT going back until I know for sure that she's not in some random guy's arms!" His eyes held that lethal and unquestionably insane glimmer again, probably thinking about what he's going to do once he gets his arms on that poor guy. I would not like to be in his place, that's all I can say.

"So what do we do then?" I asked aggravated by his lack of forethought while sinking down in my seat, expressing my unhappy mood to the fullest of my abilities. Glaring at the mirror that reflected Wufei's determined, if not slightly mad face, I asked myself again for the countless time that day what exactly am I doing. A voice in my head that sounded suspiciously like Quatre informed me: "it's because they are your friends." and that answer doesn't satisfy me one bit.

"Drive around aimlessly?" Heero offered oh so helpfully.. what did I see in this guy again? Another voice in my head, louder than the first and identical to Relena's, told me to think about his ass and miraculously an answer was found, but this time, I hope it can satisfy me like no one else has.... Ah! Bad, bad thoughts!

"I have no problems with that." Wufei offered his consent and once again, they both looked towards me for the final vote, silently pressuring me to agree. Alas, I can never win.

"Fine! Do what you want, we'll just drive around without a destination until we die, looking for a blond girl who we have no clue is located, not to mention the gas money we're wasting!"

Completely overlooking the sarcasm, those two looked at each other.

"Great, I knew that you'd see it my way!" Wufei patted me on the back cheerfully with a maniac grin on his face.

A bunch of crazy, psychotic, insane lunatics in a single car, this ought to make my day...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tired and sore from sitting in a seat for the past hour and an half, I winced as I entered the shop once again. It was about 8 at night and two seemingly completely energetic boys followed me with no signs of discomfort. What the hell was wrong with them?

"Hey, I was wondering where you guys went." Relena waved from behind the counter merrily, obviously in a good mood from her date, the same origin of my headache. At her smile, Wufei's face darkened and the hand he held to the side tightened into a fist.

"What's wrong?" Relena, sensing that there was something amiss looked towards me, only to see a wince on my face as the pain in my lower half finally settled. Heero looked completely unruffled and collected and for the life of me, I have utterly no clue how he does it.

"Wufei?" Finally noticing the less than pleasant scowl that Wufei didn't try to conceal one bit, she stared at him guardedly, knowing that something was going to happen, and that it was not in her favor. But I was proven wrong as Wufei pounced into action, literally.

I SO didn't expect that Wufei had it in him to do what he did next. Here I thought that I had him figured out from head to toe and was fully prepared for him to end tonight with one of his infamous speeches. Normally, he would go on and on about how it was dishonorable that a woman would go out unprotected with a complete stranger, followed by an all out war between the two. But boy, was I ever wrong in this case.

Wufei suddenly looked curiously calm and regarded Relena with intense emotions in his eyes that immediately caused her to blush a scarlet red, looking down bashfully. Without a word, he pulled her forcefully into his arms and swept her up from the ground, his strong arms supporting her lithe body. Relena's eyes widened at the position she suddenly found herself in and instinctively wrapped her arms around Wufei's neck to stabilize herself. She only realized that it was not the most modest thing for her to do when a smirk that looked dangerously close to a leer came to Wufei's mouth.

....Before it descended on Relena's mouth that is. Her eyes widened but gradually her eyelids fluttered closed and right before Heero and me, they proceeded to have a long overdue make out session enthusiastically. Whoa, it's getting hot in here. It's good that they are finally getting it together, but still...it's called breathing and it's supposedly good for you.

Heero and I looked away to grant them some privacy and it seems as though they've forgotten that anyone else was in the room, completely overwhelmed with the utopia that they found within each other. After withstanding three minutes of moaning and other R-rated sounds, I couldn't endure it any longer and politely coughed to remind them exactly where they were, and who else didn't want to be there with them...

Breaking away hastily, both looked embarrassed that they lost control but the awkwardness did nothing to disguise the secret pleasure that was so obvious in their eyes. Wufei gently released Relena, helping her to the ground and then, both regarded the other for a few noiseless moments.

"Why" Relena asked softly, looking at Wufei tenderly and lovingly. It was an expression rarely seen publicly in her eyes directed towards him and yet, here it was pooling in her eyes, raw and bare for the world to acknowledge. It shocked Wufei wordless and I felt more like I was violating their privacy by looking at her at this moment than when they were kissing. Once again, I turned my back, and found Heero mirroring my movements.

"You were on a date..." Wufei, feeling inarticulate and shocked by the unadulterated emotions flooding Relena's eyes was only able to transfer some of his muddled thoughts to the girl silently watching him.

Looking incredulously at Wufei, Relena's face slowly changed into an indescribable expression. Her mouth twitched as if she was debating with herself and suddenly, we found her on the ground, laughing hysterically and holding her sides in the sweetest kind of pain. Wufei stared at her, absolutely shocked at the quick change in mood and completely oblivious to what in the world was so funny in his words that had caused her to react in such a way. He knew that she was snickering at his expense and after what they've just shared, a deep sense of betrayal stabbed him. The passion he felt suddenly became rage as he screamed at her, wounded by her act.

"What? Damn onna!" Well, great to know that he'll never change, not even for Relena. Or is that bad?

"I wasn't on a date!" said a snickering Relena, still on the ground, breathing raggedly. Gasping for breath, she continued while the male population in the room looked at her disbelievingly.

"I just said that because I needed an excuse to go out unnoticed and it was the first thing that popped into my head!" Finally calming down, she looked at a bewildered Wufei with the same tenderness that she has never communicated to another being but him alone.

"Where were you then?" I asked Wufei for him, considering that he looked as if he couldn't talk for the life of him.

"Today is the 17th." Yes, I realize that...that's how this whole damn business started!

"It's also the anniversary of when Wufei and I first met in college." Hearing that, Wufei appeared even more disorientated than before while Heero raised an eyebrow urging for her to continue her confession.

"I went out secretly to buy him a gift because I wanted to surprise him." Blushing again, she looked down at her hands where, out of nowhere, a small package appeared. Wufei looked at the package that was offered to him timidly and if I had a picture of this, I would have treasured it forever. It was just so....cute! Awwwww!

However, I knew that it was the perfect time for me to leave the little room wisely to themselves. Trusting that they'd lock up, I tugged on Heero's sleeves, silently gesturing for him to leave with me and to permit them with some much needed time alone. He nodded in agreement and walked out with me. Wufei and Relena never looked back at us as we closed the door behind us, lost in the presence of the other and seeing each other for who they really are for the first time.

Outside the shop, I looked up at the open sky, glittering with the stars that make me feel so insignificant due to the brilliant radiance they cast upon their dark background. It was one of the main reasons why I named my shop with a reference to heaven. Dimly aware of a presence next to me, I looked around to find none other than Heero, who was also looking towards the mysterious and hauntingly beautiful sky. Just when I thought that he couldn't possibly shock me more with his beauty again, I was proven wrong. Seeing him in the night light, hazily covered by a faint sheen of luminosity from the lamp post, he looked serene and ethereal in the inner strength that he possessed. The intensity of those eyes is only magnified by the shadows that engulfed us. I would sell my soul to keep this moment forever.

"I guess today was not the best day for you to come over." I said softly to him as he finally lowered his gaze to settle on my face.

"Maybe not." He agreed in almost a whisper, both of us fearful of breaking the tranquility that surrounded us with our unnecessary loudness.

"I'm sorry." I reluctantly lowered my gaze from his and looked down at my foot apologetically.

"I know that you came for a professional review because I practically demanded you to come. Plus, I'm sorry for what happened today because that was probably as unprofessional as it can get and I know you're a very busy man." Looking even lower to avoid the all knowing gaze I felt on my back, I continued to attempt letting this boy go from his forced duties, and from my life after today. Just the single thought of never seeing him again can bring me near to tears.

"I would understand this time if you gave me a less than wonderful review." My voice reached its lowest pitch as I tried to hide the misery I felt so sharply, and nearly choked on my own words in the process. A long, almost unbearable stillness followed my words and I started to finger my bride nervously to occupy my mind.

"Are you open next Sunday?" My head snapped up at that unforeseen question and maybe it's the darkness of the night, or my own delusional mind, but I could have swore that I saw the tiniest hint of a smile quiver in the corners of Heero's lips. If I'm delusional, then I don't want to be lucid. I smiled at him in return and wordlessly accepted his offer of another trial...

And the precious friendship that was implied in his extended hand...

next chapter!